When Dreams Die...

"There are many devices in a man's heart; nevertheless the counsel of the Lord, it shall stand." Proverbs 19:21

Good morning, my dear friends,

Photo: ayank pixabay

Growing up, I was full of dreams of what I wanted to accomplish with my future.

As a career I saw myself as a teacher, journalist, writer, a dancer (ballet dancer, despite the fact that I had never taken any dance lessons) and ... actress. Fortunately for the world, these two last dreams have never seen the light of day.

I saw myself single at some point, living the rest of my days in an exotic location, travelling and experiencing all that the world had to offer me.

Fortunately again, all that changed the day I met Christ at the age of 13. Becoming a child of God, and to having my life turned upside down for the better, did change my selfish dreams. God gave me a different perspective of my life: my life no longer belonged to me, and I willingly put aside my plans to be God's child and faithful servant.

Obviously, what the Lord has in mind for me is much better than my childish dreams.

After giving my life to Jesus, He gave me new dreams. I wanted to serve Him full time. I wanted to marry a man of God, and raise a family on biblical principles. I wanted to spend my life talking about God all around me. I thank God that in His grace He accepted these dreams, and those dreams are the ones I aim for day by day.

Along the way, I had other dreams, more discreet, which I kept in my heart.  They are the kind of dreams, "If I have time, I would ..." or "If ever God allows, I would ..." or "If I have a little money, I would ... "and I breathed these wishes out in  my prayers or thought about them in my heart. Sometimes I shared them  with others, but often not. God and I were aware of them, and that was enough.

 Occasionally, I saw God in His grace grant me my wishes, and I saw my dreams came true. For example, I prayed for the house in which we currently have, a desire to live in one place in a more permanent way, and God said yes. But other dreams were not in God's plan for me, and I had to abandon those desires to be a faithful and submissive servant.

 This is not always easy. Sometimes it's very painful.

What do I do when God says "no," to something I have in my heart, but God does not allow to come to pass in my life? I searched a bit in the Scriptures, and I discovered two people who had to abandon their dreams, to serve God faithfully. Here are their examples and lessons that God gave me contemplating their lives:

1. My disobedience can end a heart's dream. Moses served God faithfully for years, as a leader of the people of Israel. God had entrusted him with the task of leading God's people through the desert to the Promised Land. It was a heavy responsibility, and Moses had to fight constantly against a rebellious people, external enemies, harsh living conditions and his own flesh. Moses faithfully fulfilled his task, except in a moment of anger, when his frank disobedience to God blocked his path to the Promised Land. In Numbers 20:12, God ennumerates the consequences of acts of Moses: "And the LORD spake unto Moses and Aaron, Because ye believed me not, to sanctify me in the eyes of the children of Israel, therefore ye shall not bring this congregation into the land which I have given them." What a great disappointment to Moses! He saw his dream disappear before those eyes, because of his bad choices. How important it is to keep my heart pure before God, believing in His promises, and not to yield to temptations in my life.

 2. A perfect obedience to God may have me give up my most cherished dreams. David, the man after God's heart, had a project he wanted to achieve for God.  He wanted to build the Temple. There was nothing wrong with this desire: it was not a selfish or shameful desire, but David had to see this dream left unfinished in his lifetime. Why? Because it was not part of God's plan for his life. Being obedient to God will mean that my plans and projects are secondary to what God has for my life, and this should be normal. God sees all circumstances, and He alone knows perfectly His plan for my life and for this world. II Samuel 7 describes the reaction of David, when he learned that God was going to accomplish this project not in his lifetime, but during the lifetime of his son: "Who am I, O Lord GOD, and what is my house, that thou hast brought me hitherto? " (II Samuel 7:18) Instead of complaining or trying to "convince God of his mistake," David accepted this change with grace and humility of heart. Do I have the same reaction when God said "no" to the most cherished dreams of my heart?

An obedient life that honors God means that I give the first place in my life for God to rule over everything, even my plans and desires. If I persist in doing my own will, even if the dream is a "good thing," but God is not in my project, then my plan is doomed to failure. Proverbs 19:21 helps me to remember:  "There are many devices in a man's heart; nevertheless the counsel of the Lord, it shall stand."

Will I leave the last word to God today, even if it means that one of my "dreams" will die?